


Fisting

by using_this_name



Series: Crackity Crack [44]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Balloon Animals, Condoms, Crack, Drabble, Episode Tag, Fisting, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-22
Updated: 2013-06-22
Packaged: 2017-12-15 16:35:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/851658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/using_this_name/pseuds/using_this_name
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An episode tag for 3x02.  In which more than one fisting joke was made.  What even.</p><p>But, in case you were not content with two, here is a third sterek fisting moment.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fisting

****Derek:**  **Just because you have the XXL condom does not mean you have to use it. And why would you put a condom on your arm, anyway?

**Stiles:**  What else am I supposed to do with it?

**Derek:** I don’t know, make balloon animals?

**Stiles:**  It _is_ an animal! It’s a giraffe! This part is the neck, and then here’s the head. It can even talk to you! See? *in balloon animal voice* Hello, Derek! Could I please go up your…

**Derek:**  Somehow, that’s not making me any more enthusiastic.

**Stiles:**  Oh come on! It’ll be fun.

**Derek:** I am super doubtful of that.

**Stiles:** I could always go back to Deaton and ask for one of those gloves again?

**Derek:**  No! The first three times were bad enough! He keeps stopping me in the supermarket to talk about ‘knowing my limits.’ And asking if I’m having trouble pooping. I’m an Alpha! Alphas don’t have trouble pooping!

**Stiles:** I’m starting to think you make up a lot of this werewolf lore you keep telling us. And anyway, I like having the long gloves when we’re dealing with dead bodies. Remember that time I accidentally got brain matter on my…

**Derek:**  Yes. Yes I do. You wiped it off on my…

**Stiles:**  Whatever. It made you look rakish.

**Derek:**  It made me look like a deranged murderer!

**Stiles:**  Honey. You are deranged. And you had just murdered the…

**Derek:** THAT’S NOT THE POINT!

**Stiles:**  No need to get all murdery again! Let’s get you calmed down. You know what will calm you down? Playing with Geoffrey the Giraffe. *in balloon animal voice* Yeah, Derek! Let’s play a game in your…

**Derek:** I will rip out your little giraffe throat. With my teeth.

**Author's Note:**

> If you want updates as they happen, follow me on tumblr, where I am going by using-this-name (with dashes instead of underscores).
> 
> I would also LOVE any prompts that you would like to send me on tumblr. Any pairing, or any trope!


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